Wednesday, January 14, 2015

3 years...

"Child loss is not an event,
 it is an indescribable journey of survival." 

I am so grateful today and every day for the 2.5 years of joy this little angel brought into my life.  
I can hardly believe it's been 3 full years since he's been gone.  
I don't know how my heart does it.  
I am broken-hearted that Tripp won't be here to meet his new brother or sister soon.
That we won't get to buy "big brother" shirts and take pictures plenty of pictures together.
It's not fair.  And it hurts.  
But I realize this is not something I can change and that God had a different plan for our lives.
So I am hopeful that this new baby will have the greatest big brother guardian angel in heaven.  

Mommy misses you so much, sweet boy. 
I'm so thankful for all of the pictures and videos I captured of 
you so that I can keep your memory close in my heart...
Every day, but especially on days like today, 
when the bad memories and the pain try to sneak in. 

From the day you were born, until the day you took your last breath in my arms,
you filled my life with so much happiness.  
I had never felt more complete. 
I dream about the day me, you, Stephen and your new sibling are together again as one big family. 
And until then, I will never, ever stop missing you.  
Not for one day.