So, I was thinking that I wanted to do a post that was a little more positive- and since I don't have many positive things to say about Tripp is feeling, I wanted to talk about the homily in church last night. I honestly felt like no one else was there and the priest was talking directly to me (I've been feeling like that a lot lately). But he talked about prayer and HOW we are supposed to pray. NOW, I am NOT a big Bible reader- BUT I am starting, trying, and learning. So please bear with me. The priest said that there is no need for us to go on and on by repeating ourselves. All you need is one line, short and to the point- for Jesus to hear you. And he gave many examples of Jesus' prayers and the prayers of his diciples. Such as: "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done." -Luke 22:42 When He says, "remove this cup from me" he means either his present sorrows and distress, or his upcoming sufferings and death- But then he says that He wants God's will to be done, not His. See what I mean about him talking to me?? Sometimes I get so caught up in asking God to heal Tripp, or to take his pain away, that I forget that God's has His own plan for Tripp- and I just have to be patient and have faith in that plan. And right after that it says that an angel appeared and strengthened Him. That's where you all come in- you're my angels... and you strengthen me daily.
Then the priest talked about Lazarus- the brother of Mary and Martha. Lazarus was sick- and Mary and Martha went to Jesus and this was their prayer: "Lord, behold, he whom you love is sick." -John 11:3 But if you keep reading, Jesus remains where He is for 2 days- and Lazarus dies. Martha says to Jesus, "Lord, if you would have been here, my brother would not have died." -John 11:21 But Jesus tells her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die." -John 11:25-26 This is the perfect example of God not answering your prayers when YOU want him to, but when HE wants to- it shows that Jesus purposely stayed where he was for 2 days and let Lazarus die, because He knew He was going to bring him back to eternal life to live with Him. This I found was extremely important to me- and to everyone who is praying for Tripp... God may not be answering our prayers right now- but he knows exactly He's doing. Sometimes we have to end up waiting... not because God is doesn't hear us, or our prayer isn't acceptable, but because God has other things in mind. And we won't know what those things are until the time comes. Whether Tripp lives 100 years with EB, whether he is cured of his EB, or whether he goes to live with Jesus sooner than we think... it's not in MY hands.
Another prayer that was mentioned: "Lord, I just do not have the strength." The priest talked about how Mary says this prayer in the gospel of John at the beginning of Jesus' ministry. He says just a simple one-lined prayer like this is enough to get the point across. Once again- speaking to me.
He says the reason we Catholics sometimes repeat prayers is not to get God's attention, but to give God time to get our attention. But God IS listening. Sometimes our prayer doesn't need to be a request. When Thomas comes in face-to face with Jesus after He has risen, he says, "My Lord and my God." -John 20:28 or when the blind man calls out to Jesus, "Jesus, son of David, have pity on me." -Luke 18:38 By this prayer, God tells us that it is okay complain, groan, and whine all you want to God and know that you will be heard. God has big shoulders and He does not hold grudges.
I think the point to all of this is- You have to have FAITH. When you pray and in everything you do. Faith is the key. Trust in God, He does have a plan.
I learned a lot during the homily yesterday and I just wanted to share with you some of the important parts. And I also want to thank everyone again for the love and support that you have given me. I am so grateful to have such wonderful people in my life.
We will be going to see the pediatric surgeon today to check out his feeding tube site and then to get some more blood work drawn to see if the antibiotics are helping his WBC go down. I will do my best to update you guys when we get back :)
Have a great day!